How To Survive The Apocalypse Of Running Out Of Content For Your Blog


We all know the feeling, blogger frens. The dreaded day looming in the feature when WE ABSOLUTELY WILL RUN OUT OF CONTENT FOR OUR BLOGS. Don’t deny it. The Blogger Content Apocalypse™ is coming, thus says my wise and majestic self, when our blogs will wither and die because we have completely run out of things to say. BUT NEVER FEAR.* I am going to tell you exactly how you can survive this apocalypse. (Because surprisingly I am in possession of all knowledge. That’s why everyone else knows nothing. BECAUSE I KNOW EVERYTHING.)

*actually what am i saying? FEAR. FEAR A LOT. this is supposed to be really ominous.


Or I should say try to run away. Because you are obviously not going to be able to stop this apocalypse (or any apocalypse for that matter.) Foresee the terrible future. Eat some chocolate. Get your emotions out. Grab your cat (or some waffles, whichever is more important to you*) AND RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. I don’t know what direction you should run in. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?? Jeez. Y’all are looking at me like I have all the answers or something.

*if waffles are not more important than your cat, you obviously need to reevaluate your priorities. 

If you can’t run, then you can hide. But you better expect the authorities to come knocking at your door. The authorities in this case are OF COURSE YOUR LOVELY READERS. They were so loyal and fabulous! What did they do to deserve this, huh?? When are you posting on your blog again? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’VE RUN OUT OF CONTENT??? These questions are going to be asked, sir. You’re going to have to answer them. And after that, you’ll have to repair the fragments of your apocalyptic life. (It's okay to have mixed emotions about this.)


You can’t just go on like this! HOW WILL YOU SURVIVE? Exactly how someone in the real apocalypse would survive* of course – by stealing all the supplies you can get your hands on. To put it simply: YOU NEED TO STEAL OTHER BLOGGERS’ CONTENT. Simply go to their blogs and look at their last post, then copy/paste it onto your own blog. DONE. Or, if you prefer to be a little more creative, you can hack said blogger’s computer and find their top-secret files of blog post ideas. WHO NEEDS THAT KIND OF CONTENT?? YOU DO, MY FREN. YOU NEED CONTENT. A blogger’s gotta do what a blogger’s gotta do. It might be hard, but you are brave, sir. I BELIEVE IN YOU.

*no, not by calling the police. don’t you ever watch the apocalypse movies?? people who call the police NEVER GET ANSWERS ABOUT THE APOCALYPSE. heed my wise advice instead.




Though the Blogger Content Apocalypse™ might seem like a very real and ominous thing, IT IS ACTUALLY JUST A MYTH. No one has proved its existence. (That’s right – I’ve been speaking sarcastically this whole time. I know, big surprise. Thank you, thank you, I’ve WORKED AND WORKED on my dry sense of humor.) I’m sorry y’all – I believe in unicorns and dragons, but I don’t believe in the Blogger Content Apocalypse™. Here’s my theory: if your blog is the place where you talk on the internet, then you will never run out of things to say on your blog because you won’t run out of things to say in real life.

Can you imagine a day where you sit down to dinner with your family and you all have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to say to each other?? Like…there is no need to talk. What is there to talk about? THE DAYS OF TALKING ARE OVER.*


This sounds impossible, doesn’t it? In the same way, my frens, it is impossible to run out of things to say on your blog. Of course, not everything might be Good Content™ but…that’s another blog post for another time, isn’t it? OR MAYBE IT’S A BLOG POST YOU COULD WRITE, IF YOU HAVE “RUN OUT OF CONTENT.” Capital idea. You’re welcome.

Of course I’ve experience small terrors that LOOK A LOT LIKE the Blogger Content Apocalypse™ – such as realizing that tomorrow is the day I’m scheduled to post on my blog and LOL I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I’M GOING TO POST ABOUT. This happens to me frighteningly often. But guess what? I SURVIVE EVERY TIME. Yes, there are tears, but I make it out alive. I MEAN LOOK. I just wrote 928 words about NOT HAVING ANYTHING TO WRITE ABOUT. If that’s not rock bottom, I don’t know what is. (Maybe the real apocalypse? Maybe the apocalypse of NO WAFFLES?? omg no. don’t give me nightmares.)

*I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING AND YOU’RE RIGHT. this is the kind of apocalypse that happens to me whenever i am in public. what do you know, i have absolutely nothing to say! except i want to go home, did you know that? i hAte aWKwaRd siLeNceSSSSSSS.



Have you ever experienced the terror of the Blogger Content Apocalypse™? HOW DO YOU SURVIVE IT?? Have you ever run out of things to say in real life? Do awkward silences absolutely SLAUGHTER YOU TO BITS AND PIECES like they do to me?? If you had to run, would you grab waffles or your cat?

love,
abbiee

p.s. this blog is undergoing a few changes based on the survey you lovely people took the other day. but don't worry nothing too drastic. ;)

32 comments

  1. I'M PRETTY SURE THAT I'M EXPERIENCING THIS APOCALYPSE RIGHT NOW AND IT IS NOT FUN. But I shall make it out alive. I am determined.

    Also I'm afraid that I would have to be a #TEAMWAFFLE traitor and save my cat. Because I CAN MAKE MORE WAFFLES BUT I CAN'T EXACTLY MAKE ANOTHER CAT GOSHDARNIT.

    Seriously Abbie, I was dying reading this. XD You never fail to absolutely crack me up.

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    1. OMG GRACE ANNE LET ME HUG YOU AND GIVE YOU WAFFLES I PROMISE EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT. <3 Very true about the cat though...YOU ARE MORE LOGICAL THAN I, MY DEAR. :') ASDFGHJKLKJH THANK YOU SO MUCH omg that makes me so happy gdjsk

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  2. this is HILARIOUS. i loove your sarcastic posts. and the trademark thing is the best! it reminds me of how i used to draw heart shaped cat faces with TM next to it as a kid - it was my trademark cat. xD looking forward to the changes!

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    1. ASDFGHJKL THANK YOU SO MUCH ANDREA. <3333 and omg your trademarked cat that is so awesome :''') EEEEEEEEEEEP THIS COMMENT MADE ME SMILE

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  3. HAHA I LOVE THIS XD. Also YES I run out of content - but I can normally come up with something to post pretty quick *nods*. And AWKWARD SILENCE. The bane of my existence *shudders*. At least you don't have them on the internet XD.

    ~ Savannah
    scattered-scribblings.blogspot.com

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    1. YAAAS THANK GOODNESS AWKWARD SILENCE DON'T HAPPEN ON THE INTERNET. Or else I would probably never be seen on the internet. :''') ASDFGHJKL THANK YOU SO MUCH SAVANNAH I'M SO HAPPY YOU LIKED THIS POST <3333

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  4. Okay but first of all CAN I JUST SHOUT ABOUT HOW PRETTY YOUR BLOG ALWAYS IS AND HOW FUN AND NICE TO READ AND JUST VERY PLEASING TO BEHOLD??? BECAUSE IT IS. And I don't say it enough! *throws waffles of appreciation at you*

    Also, hhahhahah. YES. I mean, pfft, if you can't think of a blog post tooooootally go heist one off someone else. WORKS EVERY TIME. hahahh. *shoves someone off a cliff* 😂 Ahem, no but really, I totally agree that you'll always have something to blog about! And like, if one has been blogging for several years it is 100% okay to ... um... plagiarising yourself. My post today is LITERALLY a rerun of a post I did last year. Just like an updated version hahah. And it's handy to do that because blog audiences are always changing and growing and even if you have the same followers, they probably won't remember what you said a year ago anyway. I don't even remember what I blogged about last week. Probably cake?? Seems legit??

    Also, omg, I sit down at the table and have NOTHING TO SAY ALL THE TIME.😂 I think I use up all my words at the internet. My family is like "so what's new with you" and I'm like "I am a potato" because that's about the only update I have. *nods*

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    1. OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH THAT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME BECAUSE YOU'RE LITERALLY THE QUEEN OF AESTHETICS (and also queen of the dragons but y'know side note) *catches waffles of appreciation and eats them* THANK YOU MUAHAHAHA. We are vicious post pirates aren't we? NO NO I KNOW WE ARE VERY ORIGINAL AND NICE. *nods convincingly* BUT YES OMG THAT IS A FABULOUS IDEA. And very good logic behind it. HONESTLY I WOULD FORGET WHAT I WROTE A POST ABOUT LAST YEAR TOO. :') cake sounds legit for sure.

      YES SAME I USUALLY HAVE NOTHING TO SAY TO MY FAMILY. xD Perhaps it is possible to get it all out on the internet?? I MEAN SOCIAL MEDIA INTERACTION IS STILL SOCIAL INTERACTION, SO.... (i feel like this could be a blog post too muahaha) THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING DUDE <3333

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  5. hopefully its not too drastic bc my nerves. have you no respect for my poor nerves? :')

    teach me the ways of your dry sense of humor so people will think i am funny also its not fAIR. I DEMAND TO KNOW. you'll also be glad to know that i would abandon every cat in the world for just 1 waffle. you do the math. one waffle. all the cats. the world would be a better place for it. saving a cat before a waffle??? like???? tin fit tin fair tin right tin proper.


    ily man

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    1. no ur mistaken my dear i have the highest respect for them. RESPECCCCCCCT. like carrying the groceries and such juice. WOW YES THE WORLD WOULD BE A BETTER PLACE IF ALL THE CATS WENT UP IN THE APOCALYPSE. (sorry cats) tin right tin fair tin fit tin friendly.

      ily moar john boy

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  6. This post's got me laughing xDDD

    AWKWARD SILENCES ARE THE WORST THEY'RE SO...... AWKWARD GAH

    Okay, I'm experiencing a variation of your apocalypse: I have a lot of things to say, but I think it's all boring which makes me not wanna post anything!! DO YOU HAVE SURVIVAL TIPS FOR ME oh wait this whole post is a survival tip.

    *runs away screaming*

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    1. ASDFGHJKL YAY I AM SO GLAD YOU LIKED THIS POST DEAR. and wow yes awkward silences they slaughter me every time. :''') UGH I FEEL YOUR PAIN BUT YES ACCORDING TO MY ADVANCED SURVIVAL GUIDE YOU SHOULD RUN AWAY SCREAMING. *nods approvingly* *and gives you waffles*

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  7. Don't worry. I've got my priorities straight - waffles, not the cat.

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  8. This is classic: writing a post on running out of content when you've run out of content. XD

    And yes, I do run out of things to say in real life.. Small talk bothers me too, which makes it harder, because I'd rather not talk about the weather, you know?! Anyway, it's all a learning experience I guess - if we survive one Blogger Content Apocalypse we can make it through the next one. :)

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    1. YOU KNOW ME WELL JESSICA. omg small talk is honestly the worst. LIKE I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE UNIVERSE AND WHAT MAKES STARS BLOW UP AND WHAT MAKES OUR BRAINS REMEMBER THINGS AND WHAT MAKES ME CRY WHEN I LISTEN TO THAT SONG. not the weather. :') I FEEL THAT SO HARD, DUDE. <3 thank you so much for reading!!!

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  9. OMG ABBIEE I AM LAUGHING OUT LOUD!!! great post. Also, I was just thinking today that I have run out of ideas for my blog. YER A MIND READER, ABBIEE.

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    1. ASDFGHJKL THANK YOU SO MUCH OMG <3333 *is flailing and so happy after reading this comment* :'''') I'M SO HAPPY YOU CAN RELATE TO THIS.

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  10. Solution #3, grab your cat, run to my house, and then I'll give you copious amounts waffles in exchange for boundless knowledge of blogging. XD
    BUT SERIOUSLY THO GIRL!!! TEACH ME YOUR WAYS!
    <3 Lizzy

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    1. OOOH I LIKE THIS IDEA BETTER THAN ALL THE OTHERS. *grabs my nonexistent cat and hightails it to your house for many waffles* EEEEP THANK YOU MUCHLY YOU ARE SO KIND :''')

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  11. I too have experienced alarmist moments of writer's block when I had no idea what the hell to post on my blog. (I have also posted stuff on writer's block in response, LOL.) But the famine always ends and a new bountiful harvest of post topics emerges. Personally, I like to browse literary news, find things I agree or disagree with and talk about those subjects.

    Also, being an absolute nerd and bouncing over the entire internet like a ping-pong ball for ideas helps find topics. Seriously, it helps. :P

    Elisabeth @ Inkspelled Faery

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    1. SO VERY TRUE ELISABETH. :') "But the famine always ends and a new bountiful harvest of post topics emerges." << yes!! THERE IS HOPE. Even though the apocalypse can seem rather bleak at times. ooh those sound like some great ideas for inspiration!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING. <333

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  12. waffles > cats.

    i have a particular dislike for cats anyway SO we're all good there.
    Anyway, this post was so good to read! I think right now I'm in a no-inspiration zone because I know that i need to get up and take pictures and post and I EVEN HAVE THE IDEA YAY but I just don't feel very inspired. agh.

    But I loved this post so much, Abbie. LIKE REALLY THOUGH YOUR POSTS ARE ALWAYS SO FUNNY like how do you never get stuck in this apocalypse man?

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    1. YAAAAAAAS. THANK YOU AUTUMN. CATS SCARE ME TBH. :''') *high fives* omg I know that feeling soooo well Autumn. Like a lot of times when I'm going to post something on my blog I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO WRITE ABOUT but I just don't have the energy to actually write it?? IDK IT'S STRANGE. Maybe we need more tea. <3

      ASDFGHJKLKJHG THANK YOU SO MUCH ACK THAT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME <33333 idk how i do anything i just flail about and stuff :''') *hugs you copiously*

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  13. My blogging apocalypse looks more like a drought than an invasion. Slowly stealing my time and thoughts...

    On a less serious note (or more serious note, depending on how you look at it) I would grab my cat, no brainer. I can make more waffles, but I can't have God make me another Patches. Or Nora, my sister's cat who is currently washing her face on my bed. It's uber adorable. Give me a minute...

    ...

    Anyways, ABBIEE YOU ARE FABULOUS AND DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE!!!!

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    1. GAH I FEEL THAT FIRST LINE SO HARD. blogging can be terrifying can't it? *MUCH NERVOUS LAUGHTER* you're a better soul than I am for saving your cats :''') I'M SURE PATCHES AND NORA ARE ADORABLE EXCEPTIONS. <3 ASDFGHJKL YOU ARE SO KIND AND FABULOUS YOURSELF THANK YOU HANNAH. *much hugs much waffles*

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  14. Pretty sure your posts are the best ever. (AND YOUR HUMOR IS HILARIOUS. XD)

    I don't personally have a blog, but I may get one someday, so it's a blast seeing what bloggers have to say about their craft. But I like doing brainstorming anyway. I already have a huge list of post ideas written up, mwahaha. :3

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    1. PRETTY SURE YOU ARE THE BEST OF EVER FOR ALWAYS LEAVING SUCH SWEET AND KIND COMMENTS ON MY BLOG. :''') also omg yeS YOU SHOULD TOTALLY GET A BLOG BECAUSE IT WOULD BE FABULOUS. thank you so much for reading, dear!! ❤️

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  15. Love your posts to death!
    *grabs waffles*

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    1. THANK YOU SO MUCH OMG *hugs u*

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  16. GAH I'M PRETTY SURE I EXPERIENCE THIS FEELING EVERY OTHER DAY?? Seriously. I try to have my posts planned out for the month so there's no last minute panic, BUUUUT a lot of times I'm staring at my OneNote file thinking, "nope. there's nothing. my mind is blank. I'M dOoMeD."

    But I've made it this far, so. Life will keep changing and my writing will change and I'll learn new things and have stories about experiences so YES. What you said. *applauding*

    (I'm grabbing allll the waffles since I don't own a cat. rip.)

    // katie grace
    a writer's faith

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    1. I STRUGGLE IS SO REAL. :''') but I'm so happy you can relate to this. I KNOW RIGHT I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEMS. I usually come up with a general concept of what I want to write but then when it comes time to write it I'm like "lol waht is inspiration HOW ABOUT SOME PINTEREST" *head desk* it's not good.

      *HIGH FIVES FOR GRABBING ALL THE WAFFLES YOU GO GIRL* EEEASDFGHJKL THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING DEAR. <33333

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kind words are like raindrops on the desert. they make me bloom with happiness, as absolutely cliche and cheesy as that sounds. even if it's just a simple alt+3 i will heart you for it. so, go ahead! MAKE MY DAY. literally.