7 Reasons Why I Might Actually Be British

TODAY IS THE DAY WE TALK ABOUT A MARVELOUS SUBJECT: ME. I am obviously pretty awesome for a long list of reasons* but let’s talk about how I’m ALMOST certain that I am actually British.** Now for a disclaimer: I know NOTHING about British people other than what I have brilliantly learned from Downton Abbey, Mr. Selfridge, and Jane Austen books/movies. This is probably a post full of stereotypes that not all British people meet. BUT IF YOU’RE BRITISH, PLEASE DON’T THINK ILL OF ME (see that’s a phrase you guys use, right??) because I THINK YOU’RE AWESOME. And if I’m not already British, I WISH I WAS. So with that little disclaimer out of the way, LET’S GO OVER THE EVIDENCE.

*a monstrous list which we obviously do not have time to compose *LOUD COUGHING*
**OKAY OKAY so yes i actually have a small fragment of British in my blood. some tiny amount like 14% but STILL. there.

I’ve always been FAR MORE in love with tea than with coffee. (In fact coffee hates me now and gives me a stomach ache. Not nice, coffee. We are never ever getting back together.) In the afternoons, I try to always break from my work and have a cup of tea (preferably with cake or waffles or toast – TOAST IS BRITISH, RIGHT??) 

I ALSO LOOK ADOPTED IN THIS REGARD. My family goes to the beach and the only one who looks like they didn’t go to the beach is ME OF COURSE. I am perpetually ghostly-white or slightly sunburnt. There is no in between. Is this a good or bad thing? We don’t know.*

*but at least i’ll have something in common with our newpresident?? #AllHailThePale

It’s become routine for my sister to accuse me of not laughing at her jokes – OR SHOULD I SAY “BRITISH LAUGHING” AT HER JOKES. It’s like laughing, only it’s silent. Because we don’t like people to see us smiling and all that nonsense. Also your joke was brilliant, I was crying laughing in my head…it just didn’t reach my face. No hard feelings.

CAN WE TAKE A MOMENT TO APPRECIATE BRITISH ACTING?? Because I am 10000% convinced that British acting surpasses American acting by LIGHT YEARS. Why is this?? You would think that after all the beautiful BBC dramas, our Hollywood folks would hike themselves over to the UK and get some proper lessons in acting. Also it’s fair to say that I’ve never been obsessed with a non-British TV show. It just has not happened, sir. Even the shows I was addicted to AS A SMALL CHILD were British. That’s devotion right there. Or BLOODLINE?? IDK. YOU TELL ME.

Of course I care about money. WE ALL DO, KIND OF, RIGHT?? But I don’t want people to think I ever worry about money. Nope. I’m totally calm and composed and nothing stresses me out! NOT EVEN A POTENTIAL APOCALYPSE NOPE I’M FINANCIALLY GOOD EVEN THOUGH I HAVE $2 IN MY BANK ACCOUNT.

Oh dear, now you want to HEAR IT don’t you?? Fine then.

Why can’t we be cool, calm, and collected ALL THE TIME?? Why can’t we at least APPEAR that way? So that other people see us and are like “omg goals” because they wish they weren’t so illogical and emotional too?? I’m not sure if this is a British thing or a Vulcan thing, but I’ll embrace it either way.

So what do you think? AM I ACTUALLY BRITISH? Here’s another question: are YOU actually British?? (with or without knowing it…also if you legit ARE British please tell me if I’m at all right in thinking that I belong in the UK.) Can you speak in a different accent? Are you on #TeamCoffee or #TeamTea?? (WHOA that’s the big question right there.)


When Does Your Book Actually Become A Book?

I tell people that I am a writer, but if we’re being honest, I am currently plotting and dreaming up more books than I have actually written in my life.* SO THE SITUATION IS A LITTLE AWKWARD. I’m going to write all these books, but right now I just have a lot of messy thoughts, even messier notes, and beautiful Pinterest boards. THAT’S NOT A BOOK.** It’s just an idea floating around in the dark and scary territory of my brain. So does this mean my future books aren’t actually books yet? That question raises another question: WHEN DOES A BOOK BECOME A BOOK? I’ve been wondering this for a while, sir. LET’S FIGURE IT OUT.

*i’ve written 4 novels and i am currently plotting 10 novels (side note: pray for me)
**although i think we should redefine the last one a little…i mean a pinterest board could SORT OF be a book??

Not really. It becomes your book, perhaps, if you bought it.* The printed word has existed long before you got your greedy little bookish hands on it. There was all that formatting and editing to be done...to the book.

*or if you’re THAT PERSON and stole from the library

Not really. Because before it was published, it was a manuscript. And before that, it was a draft. A draft which the writer probably sweat, bled, and cried over. (Because writing is a sweaty bloody and tearful business. :''''')

Not really. The words “the end” don’t add much to a manuscript, wouldn’t you say? And throughout writing this manuscript, I’m pretty sure a writer refers to the beast as a “book” they are working on.

Not really. Because that isn’t much of a book, is it? A couple of sentences? A page, maybe? EVEN A CHAPTER. At what word count does it qualify as a book? Or is it some of a book but not a whole book so it's technically NOT a book?? I AM VERY CONFUSE. 

Everything starts with an idea. ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING.* The idea behind the book is what makes the book the book. The idea in its entirety is the dream. And if you can dream it YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT CAN HAPPEN. (Alright pep talk over, thank you, it’s been great.)

*except for things invented by accident. such as chocolate chip cookies. but we’ll forgive that person for making this mistake.

This is where the tricky part comes in – ACTUALLY FOLLOWING THROUGH. People who are all talk and no action aren’t writers. Writers are people who…um…WRITE. I’m not saying you shouldn’t spend a lot of time plotting – BY ALL MEANS, PLOT UNTIL THE COWS COME HOME FROM WHEREVER THEY’VE BEEN ALL THIS TIME. As for me, I have to plot very thoroughly before I feel ready to write a book. But once I get to the point where I have the thing well thought-out, IT’S TIME TO WRITE. Slaughter some words, slaughter some characters, and get the job done.

An idea is a shadow of the thing which is to come.** It’s not ink and letters – but it is a book. As long as you follow through with the WHOLE process. Because if you just think about it endlessly and then never create the book…well then it isn’t actually a book at all, is it? ACTING UPON your dreams is what makes your dreams real. They can even become as real as you’d first imagined them to be. SO WHAT NOW? Are you going to just keep thinking about killing it? OR ARE YOU GONNA PICK UP THE GUN AND KILL IT? 

I don’t know about you guys, but I get SO ASDFGHJKL EXCITED when I think about the books I’m going to write. (And sometimes I can even imagine them as films because #goals y’know?) When a story idea starts taking root in my imagination, IT IS OFFICIALLY A BOOK. Don’t let someone convince you that your thing isn’t a thing until it reaches some level of materialization. YOUR THING IS YOUR THING NOW. Because you dreamed it up. You created it.

**wow that just made me sound really philosophical and deep but i’m really not philosophical and deep sorry

How many book ideas are floating around in your head? Do you see them as “just ideas” or actual books? Or are you like me and have no idea what to call them? Unfortunately “this really cool thing that’s going to be really cool” isn’t descriptive enough for some people, jeesh. DO TELL ME ALL THE THINGS.


5 Annoying Things People Say When You Change Your Blog (Or Start A New One)

Bloggers, surprisingly, are very much like every other human on the face of the earth* – bloggers change. (Especially wildly confused teenager bloggers such as myself.) My interests are not exactly what they were at age 10. Even over the past 3 years, my hobbies and passions have changed dramatically. I believe that bloggers should write about what they love – what makes them feel ALIVE.

As some of you know, I used to have a food blog. It was called Everything Needs Salt and I poured two years of energy and devotion into that blog. Finally I realized that cooking wasn’t my passion – in fact, it was standing in the way of things that I really wanted to spend time on: music and writing. So I stopped blogging at Everything Needs Salt. It was a major refocus for me. The important thing: I WAS HAPPY. (And super excited for the new projects I was about to embark on!! MUAHAHA!) But people had some annoying things to say about it. (DISCLAIMER: I’m not trying to whine and complain here. I’m just whining and complaining, don’t mind me.

*LOLOL WHO AM I KDDING? we are far more fabulously crazy.

This is a fabulous question and one I wouldn’t mind being asked more often. THE PROBLEM IS THIS: whenever someone asks this question, they are most probably referring to my old blog – THE ONE I DON’T RUN ANYMORE. So what do you do when someone asks this question and you can just tell you aren’t both on the same page? IT’S A PAINFUL PAIN MY FREN.

“Um, well… I kind of don’t have that blog anymore. I have a different blog now. I’m kind of like…doing different stuff now. So I changed my blog.” <<< SEE? AWKWARD.

Okay so most people know what redesigning is, but not everyone likes it 100% of the time. I remember when I first redesigned my blog (this was like 300 years ago, kind sir – don’t hurt yourself trying to remember that far back.) For the longest time, I had a narrow post column and a background of a typewriter illustration – and yes: EVERYTHING WAS CYAN.* When I first changed my blog to have a white background, everyone was kind of collectively like, “AWWWWW. I LIKED YOUR OTHER DESIGN.” Some things take accepting! Don’t tailor your blog’s design to what makes other people happy – do what makes YOU happy.

* i think we all regret the decisions we make when we are twelve years old.

AND WHAT IF I DID? WHAT IF I HAPPENED TO ABSOLUTELY HAAAAAATE MY OLD BLOG AND WANTED TO RAIN DOWN FIERY WRATH OF DEMOLITION UPON IT?? Well, then, that’s my decision to make. Sometimes it’s good to not COMPLETELY delete things (because #nostalgia) but other times, hey – you might feel like GETTING IT OUT OF YOUR FACE FOREVER. And that is perfectly okay. Don’t let people make you feel guilty for moving on.

GUYS. DO YOU KNOW HOW OFTEN I COOK/BAKE ANYMORE?? EXACTLY 1% OF THE TIME.* Yet still everyone who knew about my food blog is like: “So what have you been cooking lately, Abbie?” HAHA. NOTHING. My own brain as I attempt to write books – maybe that. (But they wouldn’t understand the struggle.) The point is: it’s totally okay to go through phases. It’s totally okay to move on. People who were interested in the last thing you did will probably also be interested in the new thing you’re doing!

* as in i will occasionally put a frozen meal into the oven if my mom isn’t home to make dinner. ok and SOMETIMES i make waffles because WAFFLES DUH.
AH YES. How do I put this delicately? I LIKED MY OLD BLOG TOO BUT THERE IS A TIME AND A SEASON FOR EVERYTHING UNDER HEAVEN AND I WASN’T FEELING IT ANYMORE SO I MOVED ON. We don’t give up things because we don’t like them – we give up things because we grow tired of them. And something I tire of doing is obviously not something that makes me feel ALIVE. So we’re officially calling it quits, over, el periodo, no hard feelings. MY FOOD BLOG AND I PARTED AS FRENS.

Now let’s move on.

Have you ever changed your blog’s theme/started a new blog and deleted your old one? How did people take it? Did they say annoying things? Can you add to this list? Have you ever quit something because it was getting in your way of doing something you truly loved? LET’S TALK, FRENS.


As Cold As - A Short Story (Now On Wattpad!!)

GUYS. TODAY IS EXCITING FOR ME. As you probably heard me flail about on Instagram, today I’m publishing a short story I wrote on Wattpad! *screams happily* Y’ALL. This is the first time I’ve released a complete story for you guys to read and I am really asdfghjk nervous/excited/scared. SO BE KIND AND PATIENT WITH ME, OKAY? ;) I would be thrilled and honored if you read this little work of mine. It holds a special place in my heart and I've grown to actually really like it myself. (Also if you read it I will give you copious rainbow-sprinkled waffles!!! Not like I’m trying to bribe you or anything…)

"Elizabeth is a girl of few words. She is a figure skater who lives in a quiet house. Daniel is a boy of many words. Every day, he comes to shovel Elizabeth’s pond to make an ice skating rink. Every day she pays him ten dollars. Every day she says “thank you” and not much else. Every day Daniel tries to understand her a little better. This is a story about hiding, listening, and having the courage to unlock your heart."

• • •

ASDFGHJKL I’M SO STOKED TO HEAR WHAT Y’ALL THINK!! Please do tell either below in the comments *points violently at the bottom of this page* OR on Wattpad!